“What pisses me off is how quickly she changed…”

Fellas, you know how you’d have this picture of her in your head? That body, the curves, her mannerisms, yes… looking at (or even thinking about) her should make your heart skip two “beat”s by olisa (pun intended). Guys unlike girls don’t swoon while day-dreaming but we definitely always have that mental picture of what she looks like.


That wasn’t my case…

I saw her on a cold winter morning. Right by the bustop. Didn’t look like she was in a hurry to get anywhere. She wasn’t my idea of the one… no heartbeat skips, or pulse racing or nerve jangling. She was just there. She was OK. Some might even be brave enough to say more than very okay but the picture in my head was a lot more sexy. Yes I’m superficial, sue me… “Getting to know her wouldn’t hurt”. I thought this to myself as I pulled up to her in kaycees car. Our first encounter was a good one. I got to know more about her. Her likes, dislikes, her drive. Made me wanna know more. Apparently she was in a relationship which wasn’t working. She wanted out. I was the outlet.

Fastforward three months and there I am. The happiest I’ve ever been. You know how they say “Not all that glitters is gold”? Well lemme add that “The fact that something doesn’t glitter doesn’t mean its not valuable”. She taught me that. You see, my evelyn was beautiful. That was her name. Quite befitting too, because she was indeed a life-giver. She gave me life. She always knew how to make me feel better. With her I always felt at peace. I’m the guy here but with her I felt safe. Of course I always fought for her. Like when that mexican guy tapped her behind at the grocery store… boy did he get a talking to! I never joked with her honor. She was my pearl and would be treated as such. But around her I knew things would be ok. She was sort’a my goodluck charm. And Lord knows she was good to me.

Oh did I mention that she was my first? Yep… ergo the title “Another virginity blogpost”. The first I ever “had”. She wasn’t my first relationship but she was the first Legit one. I remember the first time. I took her with such passion. Drove her wild. The sounds she made only made me go harder and faster. The best 15 minutes of my life. It was unbelieveable. And over those three months she only got better and better at fulfilling my desires and making me feel that testosterone rush.

And then everything changed…

One Early summer morning I felt like…*ahem-ing* with her… did all the usual. Swaggered across to her where she was but I could already tell something was wrong. She was quite cold. I caressed enough to get her in the mood… but all to no avail. “She’s usually always up for it” I thought. This could not be good. Evelyn changed. She stopped talking to me. Began to spend more time with her “friend” a lowly autoshop repairman. I felt betrayed. A mechanic over an engineer? Like really? We fought over every little thing. She would refuse to come with me particularly to places where I felt it was important to go together with her. She was always never in the mood and even when we “did it” she would give me attitude. I had been nothing but good and loving to her. Why was she doing this?

The last straw was three weks ago. We had a huge fight that morning. A really huge fight. I was so bent on winning this fight that I totally lost track of time. After two hours of the most energy sapping argument ever, I realised I was one hour late for work. One whole fucking hour! Like I play with everything but the igbo genes in me make it imposible to play with my money. My job is my livelihood and I sure as hell wasn’t going to let her screw it up.

Evelyn, I loved you. I really did. And heaven knows I tried to make us work. But as they always say, “nothing lasts forever”… I’m sorry. I really trully am.

I sold my 2003 Honda accord today. The relationship just wasn’t working… Goodbye my love, the first car I ever owned.